The Art of Consideration: Seven Ways to Reward Yourself and Your Fellow Man

Sometimes the best way to help yourself, relax, and recharge is through helping others. Yesterday we examined the art of indulgence, but today I give you option two: the art of consideration. Like indulgence, consideration can leave you feeling positive, recentered, and worthy. However, unlike indulgence, consideration is not making time for you but making time for someone else. Paying it forward is as worthwhile and satisfying as taking a time out, and is a great way to give someone else a little indulgence (that they might not do on their own, especially if they didn't read the first hub!).

Each and every one of us are part of this hectic, busy, overwhelming world, and it is important for us to take care of ourselves as well as each other. The art of consideration doesn't man donating you life savings to charity, or quitting your job and becoming a missionary in Africa. Consideration means acknowledging someone else and showing them that their presence and person are as special as your own. In my own life I find practicing the art of indulgence and the art of consideration in tandem yields the best, and most refreshing results. They are not mutually exclusive, and in many ways compliment each other. Here are seven examples of how you can bring the art of consideration into your everyday life:

1) Bring the guy at the newsstand a coffee: You stop buy his cart for newspapers, Vogues, gum, and on very stressful days a Snickers bar. He is a part of your daily routine, part of your morning ritual. You have contact with him almost every day - why not buy him a coffee (a whopping $1.50 investment) to say, "Hey, thanks for always carrying Juicy Fruit - have a nice day?" I bet you will walk away with a smile on your face bigger than Glamour's "sex+love" section.

2) Call your best friend from high school. So you haven't talked in years (or maybe you talked yesterday), who cares! It will make that person feel wonderful that you were thinking of them and get you giggling in no time as you remember that not so PG senior prank you pulled...oops.

3) Learn your building's cleaning staff by name: they empty your trash while you are yelling on your blackberry, they vacuum up the remains of your burrito, and they wipe down the microwave after you unsuccessfully tried to make that Hot Pocket for lunch (a bad choice anyways). These people pick up after you while you are important at work, and usually do it silently without attracting attention. Why don't you ask their names? After all, you always say thank you as they sweep up the kitchen after lunch, but wouldn't it feel better to say, "Thank you, Ned, how are your kids?"

4) Bring someone a little treat: your office mate loves Diet Dr. Pepper - why not grab him one when you are out on your lunch break? So he may already be drinking one when you get back in, but hey, they have caps, it will keep. And so will the warm and fuzzy hey-that-was-nice feeling.

5) Give up your seat on the train: it is crowded, it is hot, and someone in your car smells...very bad. You were lucky to get a seat (as you always do), and you spend the rest of the trip staring at your feet, your book, or your iPod. Today, instead take a minute to look up at the people around you. Does that old woman need a seat? Should that pregnant woman be standing? How about the guy with the seven packages and the suitcase - his right might be easier if he could sit. You might have a reason to need your seat, which is very OK. But if you have health, strength, and nothing to weigh you down, try to give your seat to someone who is struggling. You don't need to do it everyday, but once and a while it is a great way to make someone else's life just a little easier.

6) Smile: do it at anybody and everybody. It is easy, it is free, and it releases endorphins in your brain which makes you happy (see, you can get something for nothing!). That grumpy girl behind the deli counter, maybe she had a bad day. Smile! It is probably a welcome change from everyone one you comes in hungry and frustrated. The train conductor who will (hopefully) get your home safely has a tough job, smile! When you smile at someone you are 1) sending positive vibes to them 2) acknowledging their presence 3) treating them with respect. It is a win-win situation.

7) Say Please and Thank You: This one is so simple, but so important. When dealing with customers, clients, bosses, managers, co-workers, people on the street, gas station attendants, bank tellers, and every other person who we meet during our very busy and very hectic days, we often forget these little words. But they make all the difference. "Fill it up," is an order, but "Fill it up with regular, please" is a polite, respectful request. People always appreciate "please" and "thank you" - it will never go out of style even though it is sadly going out of common practice. No matter who you are, no matter what you are doing or how stressed you are, there is never an excuse not to use little words of consideration. People will notice, and your reputation will improve among people you didn't even know were paying attention.

So friends and hubbers, go forth and make the world a little better place, one considerate act at a time. The feeling of knowing you treated the people you came across today with respect, gratitude, and honor is the best indulgence you can experience, and will continue to sparkle long after that pedicure you had to relax does. But the pedicure is important to - as long as you smile, say please and thank you, and learn your pedicurist's name.

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